SmartWool and Eggnog

Well, folks, I am back home in Simpsonville, SC, on a medical separation from Peace Corps. It is a bit difficult to explain/comprehend, but basically, when I was a sophomore in high school I had to deal with some generalized anxiety, a bioligical predisposition I received due to heredity. As you all know, I am quite laid back and easy going, so this may be hard to understand. I've tried to explain it like this: even as my conscious thought precess may not see something as a big deal, my body still reacts as if it is, producing feelings of anxiety that I don't have a lot of control over. (If you would like to know more, just let me know.) It hasn't been much of an issue in the last six or so years, but last week it flared up a bit, so on Monday I visited the Peace Corps nurses in Lomé in order to learn about the options available for treatment before I went to post. They informed me that there are no resources available in Togo, and I should go home and have it addressed, and then apply for reinstatement if I want. Thirty hours later I was at the Lomé airport, and thirty hours after that my parents picked me up at GSP.

Needless to say, I am quite confused as my life has changed so dramatically and unexpectedly in the last week. I am planning on applying for reinstatement to Togo, but it is impossible to predict these things, so right now I'm just trying to enjoy the cool weather and holiday cheer.

After I learned the news of my imminent departure from Togo, I realized that this worst case scenario was one of return to a loving family and friends to a home where all of my needs can be met and provided for with relative ease. As my previous entry explains, a major part of my motivation for doing Peace Corps was to experience a more typical, basic human existence on Earth. And even as I've had to leave a life of day-to-day living dominated by needs of survival, I believe I am experiencing the most basic aspect of life, for what's more basic than personal adversity and self preservation? My life thus far has been incredibly free of major adversity - no one close to me has died, I've never had to worry about financial struggles, my basic needs have been provided to me by an incredibly supportive family, and I've pretty much been able to do whatever I want whenever I want. This is the first time I've had a significant barrier to my desires, and I know this will allow me to grow in a different way than if I was able to continue my Peace Corps service with no problems. While my time home means I am not able to further deepen my first hand perspective of the oppressed, of the typical human being, this new and unexpected adventure of personal adversity and self preservation is even more basic, as it is an experience shared by all of humankind, regardless of birthplace or economic class.

I sincerely hope to have this issue addressed and to return to Togo as soon as I can, as I have gained a love for the people and their culture, but I also am trying to just take it one day at a time. Thank you to all of my friends and family, as I cannot imagine dealing with this sudden change without your love and support. And to my Peace Corps/Togo pals, I miss y'all a lot, and I can't wait to hear about your times at post and to return to you as soon as possible. I made a Togolese friend on the trans-Atlantic flight, Komi, who now lives in Omaha, and he told me that there is a Togolese restaurant there that serves fufu, so I'm thinking Frosty, Wan and I will need to have a little rendez-vous in Laura's eclectic hometown.

Du courage!

FAQs

I've been thinking about how to start this blog for a little while now, and I have settled on an FAQ session. So, here we go.


Q: Is Togo a country in the Pacific Islands?

A: No, that would be Tonga. Togo is a country slightly smaller than West Virginia, and is located in West Africa, bordered by Ghana to the west, Burkina Faso to the north, Benin to the east and the Atlantic Ocean to the south.


Q: Did that popular saying about solar powered cell phone chargers and goats really originate in Togo?

A: Yes, in fact, the famous aphorism is a common Togolese saying. It reads: "Give a man a solar powered cell phone charger and he can talk on a cell phone for eight hours. Give a man two goats and he can drink for years." (credit given to my former roommate Josh Tutterow)

*Disclaimer: If you know Josh, then it should be evident that this is, of course, not serious, but for those of you who have not had the pleasure of his acquaintanceship, please note that this is a joke.


Q: Why would you want to do this?

A: This has been the most frequently asked question, and I suppose, as I am voluntarily leaving the most wealthy country in the history of the world to live in a village without electricity or running water, it is a valid question. But I have still been surprised at how many people really do not grasp my motivation, so I hope this will clear that up.

Two-thirds of the world's people live on less than $2 a day, meaning that poverty is the norm. The life experience of the average American, as I consider myself, is very different from the reality of what life is like for most members of our species. But while the experience of living on Earth for me in my first twenty-two years of life is nothing like the day-to-day activities of most of my brothers and sisters, it is the commonalities of life as humans that offers me the most excitement and hope. Being afraid when you hear something threatening in the dark, or that rush of elation when your favorite sports team makes a big play, or worrying about whether or not a friend or family member is happy and what you can do about it, or that curiosity that keeps us seeking; these commonalities of the human experience, our emotional relationship with ourselves and others, provide a ready-made brotherhood. It is our responsibility, as creatures with the ability of compassion, to use this inherent human bond to improve our world in the quest for a more peaceful living experience for all.

The most common complaint I have heard from returned Peace Corps Volunteers is that they felt as if they were unproductive and unable to make as much of a difference in their community as they had hoped. I believe I will not suffer this same disappointment, as I am doing the Peace Corps for a much more selfish reason. Don't get me wrong, I will do all I can to use my resources and networks to try to create a sustainable project to improve the lives of my neighbors, but that is more of a bonus. Basically, I want to try to get a taste of what it is like to live as most people in the world do, for that perspective of the many is an integral foundation for anyone hoping to do worthwhile work. In addition, I expect to learn from living a more simple and slow-paced life, free from the selfishly overly-ambitious, rushed, over-stimulated life of the West. The products of the "progress" of Western civilization, from global communication to modern healthcare to personal choice of diverse opportunities, are wonderful, and have a significant role to play in a more peaceful and happy world, but as sung in "The Dreaming Tree,"

Now progress takes away
What forever took to find.

In our rush of a life, we have become unconsciously distanced from some of its greatest treats, like community and awe. I look forward to reconnecting with some of the beauties of life while living in a more simple way.

Another reason I am doing the Peace Corps is to be uncomfortable. In the desire for personal growth and comprehension of who I am, I believe that removing the comforts from my life will force me to think and learn more and not just float along in an opiated trance, a way of life all too common in today's society. It will, by definition, not be easy or always happy, but I believe it will be worth it, and at the end of my life, I will look back on the difficult times with perhaps more fondness than the easy ones.


Q: What does the title of your blog mean?

A: "Any number free to wander" is a line from the Dave Matthews Band song, "Pay For What You Get." Basically, I just think it sounds pretty, and has a sense of adventure and hope.


Q: How did you settle on your profile picture for this blog?

A: (Okay, this has never been asked, but I just wanted an excuse to do the following.) After hours of contemplation and perusing My Pictures, I settled on a photo from this past summer in Steamboat Springs, Colorado. Thanks to my mom for snapping it. It, too, is adventurous and hopeful, and those are the traits I am most trying to connect to my impending Peace Corps service. However, I was very tempted to put this picture on my profile:

Alright, that is all for now, but I am excited about hopefully utilizing this blog to give y'all some sort of idea about my life in Togo, as well as to fend off the inevitable loneliness and longing for my friends and family. The love and support I have felt from y'all my entire life are responsible for me being able to take this adventure, so thank you, and I look forward to hearing from you across the pond. (Oh, and I realize it sounds like I'm already in Togo, but I don't actually arrive there until September 20. I will be leaving Simpsonville for staging in Philadelphia on September 17.)